7 ways to reform divorce law for men

Conservatives have long advocated ‘family values’ as a way to save the American and Puerto Rican family.  I’ve never agreed with this idea, since I am also a Libertarian and believe each person and each family should have the right to choose what kind of family is right for them.

There is no denying however, the importance of the family unit to the existence of a free society.  A family makes its own decisions and takes its own financial actions.  A strong family unit whether traditional or otherwise limits the need for government and its bevy of social programs (read as ‘social control programs’).

The left has been fighting long and hard to destroy the family unit.  Ending the family leaves people in need of government ‘salvation.’   Hence the compassionate need for more free housing, food stamps etc.  It is a part of a long term strategy that has been operating under the radar for decades.  It also gives women almost unlimited power over men in relationships.

It occurred to me that there may be a way to save the family without imposing any moral values on anyone.  This can be done by directly attacking the way marriage and husbands have become disposable.  In other words, going right after the left made it profitable for women to leave marriages.

Why focus on women?  Because the truth is, the majority of divorces are initiated by women.  And why wouldn’t they?  Divorce for women means all of the benefits of marriage, with none of the responsibilities.

So here are 7 ways to reform divorce laws to help men:

End alimony

The beast deal in town is alimony or palimony.  Basically the ex-wife (it’s been estimated that 90% of all Alimony dollars go to women) gets half of the man’s paycheck in many states for the rest of her life.  She is also entitled to half of his social security and other retirement benefits.  The original idea of Alimony was to help women who had no education, no skills and no way to survive without their husbands.  So instead of letting women learn to care for themselves, government stepped in and demanded men do it for them.

Ending Alimony completely is the best way to curb divorce and bad marriages in the first place.  It is the primary profit motivator when it comes to women seeking divorce.  It gives women so much power over men that many men will tolerate the intolerable just to avoid losing all of their assets; a fear most women never have to consider.

Equal division of assets (based on who actually paid for the assets)

Here is a crazy idea; what if assets were divided based on who actually paid for them and not 50/50 just because.  So if the man paid for the house, when the marriage ends; the man gets to keep his house (and his car).  He gets to keep his boat and hunting lodge or whatever extra things he paid for while his wife was out buying $400 purses.  She gets to keep the purses.

Believe it or not, this might actually benefit women.  Just like alimony is outdated since most women work these days, equal division is also outdated.  There are plenty of situations where women would keep the bulk of the property since they out earn their husbands.  The gold-diggers meanwhile would be out on the street.

Joint custody by default

There is no credible reason for not granting joint custody and equal time in all custody cases unless one partner is in prison or completely incapacitated. It is always in the best interests of a child to have both parents fully engaged in their lives.  This joint custody and equal time also means the children are less likely to be used as a tool of vengeance by one spouse (read the ex-wife) against the other (the guy).

By equal time I mean 6 months and 6 months.  Women often complain that men don’t spend enough time with their children and aren’t involved in their kids’ lives.  This would solve that automatically.

It is really hard for men to spend time with their children if they have to go through a nasty, hateful vindictive ex-wife.  Divorced men often have to work extra jobs to keep up with the payments and live in not-so-nice accommodations because it is all they can afford.  Those living conditions may also be cause for both criticism and denial of custody or visitation.

Reform child support

The other payment men face is child support.  The bulk of child support payments in real dollars go from men to women.   Women don’t always use that money for the kids.  Some women make it a career to get pregnant and put child support orders on men.  So let’s remove the profit motive all together.

Instead of making child support a specific amount, let’s make it a percentage of income that automatically rises or falls with income.  Doing it this way removes the need to go to court for any changes and it removes he need for child support agencies that do nothing more than act as a middleman between parents.

But here is the most important part: during the six months the children are with mom, the dad pays support; and during the six months the children are with dad; mom pays child support, both in the same equal percentage.

I would suggest no more than 10% of take home income per child with total payments not exceeding 25% of each parent’s income.  Another important aspect of this idea is that all children are included in the calculation. First children, second family children and second partner children.

Right now, a second spouse’ income can be included in the calculation for the total amount a man can be forced to pay an ex-wife.  While many women strongly supported the idea of spousal and child support, many are now realizing that these antiquated laws and vengeful-bitchy rules are taking food off of their own tables.

If a man or woman loses their job while married, the family cuts back and does the best it can.  If a man loses his job after divorce (very few women are ever imprisoned for failure to pay child support) he can be sent to jail, lose his license and suffer lifelong consequences. Under this rule, if you lose your job or even decide to change careers; the legal impact would be the same as if you were married: none.

Give men the right to abortion

Women have the exclusive right to abort their children.  They also have the right to give their babies up for adoption without the permission of the father and they can surrender their babies to the state.  Fathers have no choice in the matter.

Before you complain that women have the right of abortion because the fetus is growing in their bodies, let us not forget that women hold a piece of the man’s anatomy (sperm) hostage for ransom inside their bodies.  This is what I call ‘extortionary child birth.’  A family friend (in Puerto Rico) actually told his daughters to marry a rich man have one child and then get divorced and they will be set for life.  Yes, people actually think this way.

Plenty of women pursue men of means for the purpose of getting pregnant in order to force child support payments.  While both partners have the right to use contraception, the bulk of contraceptive choices are for women.  After conception women have months to decide whether or not to abort and after birth they have even more options.

Giving men the right to abort all rights and responsibilities to children they do not want, kills the profit motive for those women who seek to do this.  Certainly there will be instances where women were not attempting to extort money that will be left raising a child alone.  However, since women have so many choices; we cannot ignore the fact that child birth and rearing is in fact a choice not an obligation.  It shouldn’t be an obligation for men either.

Give men back their right of self-defense

Did you know that women are equally as violent as men?  Yep.  Study after study shows that women initiate as much if not more of domestic violence as men.  Since there is virtually no infrastructure to help men that are abused and virtually no support at the state level; half of all domestic violence events can be stopped overnight by just letting men hit back and then supporting them legally when they do.

It doesn’t matter than men tend to be stronger than women.  I don’t go around picking fights with guys that are twice my size because I’m not an idiot.  Only an idiot would believe that it is OK for women to hit men and get away with it.  Let men hit back and watch domestic violence complaints drop by half overnight.

Taking women’s ability to initiate violence without consequence changes the internal dynamics of marriage.  It forces people to talk and work out their own issues without having to get the state involved.

While we are at it, return the right of people not to press charges against each other.  Let people be adults and make their own choices.

Keep no fault divorce

This last one may seem contrary to everything else I’ve said, but it isn’t.  I don’t believe in slavery.  If you are unhappy in your marriage, you should have the right to end it whenever you want.  It is amazing how people’s mindset changes when the door to leave is open and unencumbered.

This isn’t just good for women, but it is also good for men.  If men no longer have to worry about spousal support; no longer have to worry about child support, no longer have to fear becoming homeless or winding up in prison because they lose a job they can relax and just love.  It also means they can stand up for what is right instead of keeping their wife happy even when she makes unrealistic or totally insane demands.

Not happy?  There is the door; take it, because the house is mine.

PS All of these are included as a part of the interim constitution for an independent Puerto Rico.  If you are an American citizen and support these ideas, sign the petition for Puerto Rico independence and help us establish a republic that is just as free for men as it is for women.

***NOTE: Please, consider buying one of my books which will help this blog reach more people.  Toy Farm Lemonade, The Beagle and the Dolphin and A Puerto Rican Manifesto and my latest piece ‘Life lessons from driving lessons‘ are all available today at Amazon Kindle.

Also please, consider a donation to Puerto Rican Conservative News and Franktopia to take these blogs global  Visit the PR conservative Pay Pal page to donate.  Thanks to those who have already donated.

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About worleyf

Semi-retired Media Relations guy, former radio and TV reporter and legislative aide. Middle of the road Libertarian (as if that actually existed) who reviews current news items and stories, and offers an alternative point of view.
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